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Abusive Relationships

It's really sad there are people who are in abusive relationships. The other day we had a conversation with a couple of my friends about these kinds of relationships. We talked about how women and men are abused by their so called lovers. The sad fact is when your relationship is beginning you don't know if the person is abusive and by the time you realize it's normally too late making it hard to leave. It's always disturbing to see beautiful women, all women are beautiful, in abusive relationship. Abuse in a relationship can take place in various forms i.e. physical, emotional, sexual, and in some situations controlling of your finances. It's hard to tell if your partner is going to be abusive but there are certain warning signs that should tell you to steer clear from him or her.


Jealousy is the first sign that the person could be abusive and you should run for the hills when you see it. Many people think jealousy is a sign of love, but it isn't, it's a form of a person trying to control your behaviour. Your abuser will ask about who you talk to, accuse you of flirting and be jealous of time spent with family and friends. In some extreme scenarios the bad partner my tell you to stop working, going to work or a social club in fear of you going to meet someone else. Other signs of jealousy is when the abuser calls frequently, drops in unexpectedly and asks to know your whereabouts at all times.


When your partner threatens you it should be a red flag to start packing. The threats maybe subtle statements or could be full blown statements made to your face. These statements should not be taken lightly and serious considerations should be taken from there. Your partner may not threaten you but those around you making you feel helpless about the situation. They could threaten your kids, pets and family members. If this happens to you it's time to hit the road Jack.


Abusive partners are very clever and know how to get away with taking advantage of you. Most of these guys will try and isolate you from your friends and family. They will tell you not to go visit them or spend time with them. They do this so that by the time the abuse begins you have no one to turn to and no support structure. This will make you feel lonely, unwanted with no way of getting out of the relationships. Since you burnt your bridges with family and friends you can't seek help and advice from them, leaving you stuck with him or her.


Another tactic that abusers use is to blame you for everything that goes wrong. When you hear this over and over again you will start to blame yourself as well for the bad things that happen. In doing so s/he will lower your self-esteem making you feel worthless. When this happens it will be really hard for you to leave the relationship because you will be afraid that nobody loves you.


Are there other signs that I haven't mentioned?


  1. A well written post Zaby. I follow your blog, but came across this at the Turn It Up Tuesday Linkup! Hope you are having a great Tuesday!

    1. Hey Susan, thank you for saying such kind words. I follow your blog as well and i am big fan

  2. HI. I just discovered your blog through +Susan F. and glad I did. Let's stay connected. As a victim of abuse, I thoroughly this post

    1. Hi Carol, I am glad you found my blog and you like it. I would love for us to stay connected and am sorry that you were a victim of abuse


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